Thursday, August 25, 2011

Tattoos and Epiphanies

I've been thinking about my post on nourishment and how it relates to taking care of ourselves. As this has been resonating with me for the last few days I've come to realize how giving ourselves nourishment is a good step towards caring for ourselves but it's only part of the process. Knowing what we need is bigger than just a walk in the field after a day from hell. It's about eating right, exercising appropriately, stress management and enjoying our families, our friends and our lives. It's about making decisions knowing what our priorities are and always leading from that foundation. I realize all of this seems pretty obvious but it came to me as an everyday epiphany as I looked in the mirror while braiding my hair.

For my fortieth birthday Jon and I got matching Celtic Cross tattoos. Sixteen months ago I put a Celtic trinity knot on the back of my neck. The trinity knot has come to represent  a few different things, all of which feel meaningful to me. It symbolizes the Holy Trinity (Father, Son and Holy Spirit), it also symbolizes the different but connected parts of ourselves - body, mind and soul. In Wicca it symbolizes the different stages of a woman's life - maid, mother and crone and in modern Irish culture it represents three promises of a relationship - love, honour and protection. For me my cross is a symbol of my faith and my beliefs and a reminder that God is with me always, and I with Him. My trinity knot was to be a reminder of my commitment to myself. A symbol on my body to remind myself how important all of me love, honour and protect myself; to look after my mind, body and soul. I do a fine job of looking after my mind and my soul but somewhere along the line I forgot to include my body, and I was reminded of this in a flash while looking in the mirror at the back of my head. I had almost forgotten that the knot was there (I don't see the back of my neck very often now that my hair has grown) and I remembered the promise I made to myself when I got the tattoo in the first place. I remembered the promise and in that moment I felt incredible disappointment.

I'm going to take today and the next few days to figure out what the best course of action is for me because I know if I just go off on a tangent I will get nothing accomplished and likely I'll only end up beating myself up some more (for more on that see I yelled at the dog, I need to vacuum and my hair is a mess!), which clearly isn't going to help any. I know we all struggle in one way or another with this stuff; so with that in mind, any and all suggestions are welcome! 

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